From the very first paragraph the story engulfs you. The description is amazing and the atmosphere is well set. I can feel the creeps as if I'm in the grim passage.
This reminds me of a true story in my country, which is similar to the tale of the grim passage! A remote village in the middle of the forest with an evil forest spirit that tries to enter the homes of local residents and give the poor family a curse. every one day in a week, the evil spirit will try to call one's name. And if they turn around, then the spirit will remember them; the clothes they wear, their hairstyle, even their voice and what phrases they said that day. It will become their doppelganger and try to get inside their house, or until it finds another victim to curse—another victim who turns when it calls their name. And those poor souls who have fallen victim, they are hit by a severe mental attack that even evacuation to the city can't help them from the curse.
When writing the story, I tried to come up with lore that would be the sort of thing that might exist somewhere in the world. It was loosely based on legends of All Souls Day that my parents (born in Poland) told me about - apparently on that day, it would be normal to see the ghosts of the deceased and, if you weren't careful, they might even carry you away through the fog into God-knows-where.
It's so cool that different parts of the world have similar legends. 🙂
OH??? THAT'S INTERESTING. I agree with you!! It really is so cool that different parts of the world have similar legends. Seems like these ghosts’ ancestors were sailors (it's giving moana but make it ✨ supernatural✨)
I mean, you can just check out how many cultures all around the world - some of who are completely isolated from others - have a legend about a global flood.
This was really, really beautifully written. There are so many elements I could pull out or highlight as having particularly loved, but I think this line in particular is going to stick with me: "Hunger was its own kind of ghost, following him through the streets, conjuring fantasies of pork sausages and sugary cakes."
Thank you for reading and commenting. 😊The story was the result of a prompt that I worked on with another writer and it gave me the opportunity to take a character from my story (Kytes) that we won't meet in the main story for a while and give him an chance to get some time. Also, if anyone wanted to check out my writing style before trying out the main story, this provides an opportunity.
I enjoy a richer style of prose; that's what often hooks me if I am going to read a book. And so I wanted to write the epic fantasy in a way that I imagined it "should" sound like.
Oh, very cool! I didn't realize this was kind of a standalone, but also kind of a tie-in with Kytes. I like that idea a lot, of allowing you to introduce a character, build out their background, and also indulge in a little bit of additional world building. It is such a great standalone story too. Giving Kytes some room to breathe as a character was a great call.
Loved this story. The world building was so deftly done. Perhaps my favourite element was the way you cleverly introduced us to the contrast between Kytes and the family - and thus his motivation. The supernatural elements were beautifully subtle, almost like an Anglo Saxon fable. The ending was a wonderful surprise too. Grimbright indeed!
Same thing with the character - though we will not meet Kytes or travel to Carapaethyn for quite some time in the story, so this gave me a chance to introduce them to anyone reading my stuff on Substack.
Appalachian stories are really good, very creepy. I have Shackled Destiny next in queue for reading. I had a fever these days so catching up was tough, but I’m eager to read.
From the very first paragraph the story engulfs you. The description is amazing and the atmosphere is well set. I can feel the creeps as if I'm in the grim passage.
This reminds me of a true story in my country, which is similar to the tale of the grim passage! A remote village in the middle of the forest with an evil forest spirit that tries to enter the homes of local residents and give the poor family a curse. every one day in a week, the evil spirit will try to call one's name. And if they turn around, then the spirit will remember them; the clothes they wear, their hairstyle, even their voice and what phrases they said that day. It will become their doppelganger and try to get inside their house, or until it finds another victim to curse—another victim who turns when it calls their name. And those poor souls who have fallen victim, they are hit by a severe mental attack that even evacuation to the city can't help them from the curse.
That is fascinating! 😲
When writing the story, I tried to come up with lore that would be the sort of thing that might exist somewhere in the world. It was loosely based on legends of All Souls Day that my parents (born in Poland) told me about - apparently on that day, it would be normal to see the ghosts of the deceased and, if you weren't careful, they might even carry you away through the fog into God-knows-where.
It's so cool that different parts of the world have similar legends. 🙂
OH??? THAT'S INTERESTING. I agree with you!! It really is so cool that different parts of the world have similar legends. Seems like these ghosts’ ancestors were sailors (it's giving moana but make it ✨ supernatural✨)
I mean, you can just check out how many cultures all around the world - some of who are completely isolated from others - have a legend about a global flood.
There are lots of examples like that. 🙂
This was really, really beautifully written. There are so many elements I could pull out or highlight as having particularly loved, but I think this line in particular is going to stick with me: "Hunger was its own kind of ghost, following him through the streets, conjuring fantasies of pork sausages and sugary cakes."
Thank you for reading and commenting. 😊The story was the result of a prompt that I worked on with another writer and it gave me the opportunity to take a character from my story (Kytes) that we won't meet in the main story for a while and give him an chance to get some time. Also, if anyone wanted to check out my writing style before trying out the main story, this provides an opportunity.
I enjoy a richer style of prose; that's what often hooks me if I am going to read a book. And so I wanted to write the epic fantasy in a way that I imagined it "should" sound like.
Oh, very cool! I didn't realize this was kind of a standalone, but also kind of a tie-in with Kytes. I like that idea a lot, of allowing you to introduce a character, build out their background, and also indulge in a little bit of additional world building. It is such a great standalone story too. Giving Kytes some room to breathe as a character was a great call.
Loved this story. The world building was so deftly done. Perhaps my favourite element was the way you cleverly introduced us to the contrast between Kytes and the family - and thus his motivation. The supernatural elements were beautifully subtle, almost like an Anglo Saxon fable. The ending was a wonderful surprise too. Grimbright indeed!
Thank you for checking it out. 😊
The world is actually a city from my story, Shackled Destiny, which I am serializing. I will link the index: https://aidenmarquis.substack.com/p/shackled-destinystart-here
Same thing with the character - though we will not meet Kytes or travel to Carapaethyn for quite some time in the story, so this gave me a chance to introduce them to anyone reading my stuff on Substack.
I love dark, eerie stories like this one, very fun read! You write very vividly. It was very easy to picture all of the setting and the characters!
This one reminded me of the unspoken rule of Appalachia:
"If you hear your name called, no you didn't"
Ooh, I had a friend from Appalachia and boy did he have some stories. 😯
Thank you for reading and commenting. 😊 My main series, Shackled Destiny, is likewise written in this vivid style - and there are dark and eerie elements throughout. https://aidenmarquis.substack.com/p/shackled-destiny-chapter-1
Appalachian stories are really good, very creepy. I have Shackled Destiny next in queue for reading. I had a fever these days so catching up was tough, but I’m eager to read.
My mom and my niece got sick over the holidays. I hope that you feel better, soon. 🤗
ty! I hope your mom and niece feel better soon too.
How many days until spring? Perfect read for the solstice here!
It's not going to be spring for a while. 😄
I'm glad you liked it. I figured we could inject some darkness into the darkest time of the year.